Windshield Wipers Cause Accidents!

May 16th 2007 -
A new research study has shown that drivers who have turned on their car’s windshield wipers are more likely to be involved in automobile accidents than drivers who are not using their wipers. Lead investigator Joe Blow, M.D., Ph.D. stated in an interview with this reporter that, while additional research is needed before the relationship is proven, his findings strongly suggest that the use of windshield wipers in automobiles is not helpful in preventing accidents and may actually be harmful.

The conclusion of the distinguished researcher is, of course, patently absurd. Windshield wipers are used primarily in conditions that make driving more hazardous, such as rain, snow, and sleet. It should be obvious that the use of windshield wipers clearly decreases the risk of having an accident under those conditions, but the likelihood of having an accident still remains higher than the risk of having an accident while driving on dry roads with clear visibility.

The logic that leads to the conclusion that windshield wiper use causes auto accidents is obviously faulty. It would be laughable, were it not for its current popularity in the strange world of modern medical research.

It was reported this week that men who take multivitamins more often than three times a week are twice as likely to develop advanced prostate cancer than men who do not take multivitamin supplements. Commenting on the article, editorialists wrote, "The findings lend further credence to the possibility of harm associated with increased use of supplements."

Does vitamin supplementation increase the risk of dying of prostate cancer? Along the same line, do calcium and vitamin D cause brain damage as was reported a week ago or does vitamin C cause diabetic complications as was reported last year?

A closer look at the prostate cancer study reveals that the multivitamins had no more to do with the development of advanced prostate cancer than windshield wipers have to do with the incidence of auto accidents. In both cases the logic is the same: guilt by association.

The study in question lasted five years. This in itself is significant, as prostate cancer is a disease that develops over a period of decades. To suggest that an action taken within five years of a diagnosis of advanced prostate cancer caused the disease is ludicrous.

The study found no relationship between the intake of multivitamins and the diagnosis of early prostate cancer. If the vitamins were responsible, they should have been associated with early as well as late stage cancer. Since many people begin taking nutritional supplements when their health starts to fail, it is not surprising that a higher percentage of men with advanced prostate cancer were found to be taking a multivitamin than men who were not battling cancer.

“High dose” use was defined as taking a multivitamin more than 15 times in a month. This is the most ridiculous definition of high dose vitamin usage I have ever seen. Multivitamins are based on RDAs (Recommended Daily Allowances), which represent the minimum amount of a nutrient required to prevent the immediate appearance of a nutritional deficiency disease such as scurvy or beri-beri. That is why I believe that RDA actually stands for Really Dumb Advice. To suggest that providing the body the minimum amount of nutrients required for prevention of nutritional diseases will cause another disease requires a mindset that opposes the use of nutritional supplementation with a religious fervor.

The importance of providing ODA (Optimum Daily Allowance) supplementation can be seen in another recent study that demonstrated that high selenium levels in the bloodstream reduced the risk of prostate cancer by 40 percent in men who were smokers or who were also taking vitamin E or a multivitamin.

A sane person might reasonably conclude that a single nutrient is inadequate to protect the body from prostate cancer, but can have a dramatic effect when combined with other nutrients. True to form, however, the spin placed upon the study’s findings was that high selenium levels protect individuals from the ravages of vitamin supplements, but are of no value in non-supplement users.

In a society in which 1 out of every 2 individuals can expect to experience cancer in his or her lifetime, something is drastically wrong. Certainly, multiple factors are at work, but blaming the substances that nourish the body and support its protective mechanisms is an exercise in obstinacy. It reveals the presence of unsubstantiated beliefs that cloud a person’s ability to reason. It exposes a religion posing as a science, a religion that holds that nutritional supplementation is inherently evil, and the cause of pain and suffering in the world.

Of course, I could be wrong. Perhaps windshield wiper use really is responsible for the majority of automobile accidents and the cause of pain and suffering in the world.

Dale Peterson, M.D.

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